Writing it down is not enough.

So I wrote my last post way back in July. I vowed to make a change and to follow through on what had been my 2011 New Year's resolution. Let's get to the point. I didn't. Nothing changed. There was a brief burst of cleaning and purging but then I got distracted by other things and my good intentions for permanent change went to the wayside.

This is not to say that my list of seven things has been a complete bust. On the contrary. I find myself frequently considering how I can achieve what is on the list. I know I need action, but thinking has value too. What I'm most happy about as I sit and reflect at the end of another year is how I've been trying to insprire other people to live happy. That's at the root of everything for me. It's my ultimate "what matters." To that end, I've been an anonymous cheerleader leaving gifts in coworkers mailboxes. I have so much fun imagining their surprise upon finding a gift or a note.

Today I spent time organizing a few things to post on ebay. When I'm finished, I'm going to clean the office. I'm not going to bed until I've sorted through the chaos. My goal is to clear out half. Then I need to decide what to sell or donate. It's time. I want space so I can begin working on my next challenge-- developing a secondary source of income. I have a few Etsy ideas that I want to make real.

And finally, I have a notebook to track spending. It's the tried and true pen and paper method for me. I've made a committment on "And then she saved" to go on a spending fast. I want to eliminate my non-mortgage debt by this time next year. There's not a lot, but my budget is pretty tight as it is. Can I do it? I believe I can and put money in the bank. I want to travel and to do that, I need to have security.

That's all for now. Enough talking. It's time for action.

It all comes back to what matters.

NOTE added 7/16: it's July and I haven't been writing and apparently I haven't been paying as much attention to my thoughts as I believed. Just reviewed some earlier posts, and what do you know-- they're about this very same thing-- simplification. In fact my new year's resolution is about getting a handle on my life. Ah well. Begin again. Regroup. Restart.

So I've been doing a lot of reading and thinking and more reading and more thinking and I keep coming back to the idea of simplification. I'm not sure what's gotten me back on this kick, but I start feeling trapped by stuff, by culture, by expectations (societal more than anything else)and I just want something different. I want my life to feel more like me. To use a buzzword, to feel authentic.

The other day, I stuck a bright yellow Post-it note above my desk that says, "Build a life less ordinary." I don't need to cut ties and run off completely, but I do need more than the everyday wake up, go to work, go home routine. I want some adventure. I want more sparkle, more travel, more learning, more unexpected. I want a life that fits me better.

So where do I begin? For me, it starts with a list. If I want to change and travel and explore and wander, then I need a plan. (How ironic that to gain freedom I'll need structure.)

Back on July 7, I came up with this list of guidelines (in no particular order) that seem to form the backbone of my less-ordinary plan although it's clearly a work in progress.

1. Stop spending.
2. Start keeping track.
3. Develop a secondary source of income.
4. Eliminate debt (really only have the house and the car)
5. Clear the clutter.
6. Set clear goals.
7. Reach out.

Now to start implementing these guidelines. Okay, the first one should be easy (but it won't be). Stop spending. I've tried this before with limited success. It's easy to slip back into old habits. So maybe I'll clarify and then check back. My goal will be to limit personal spending for the next month. I'll keep track for the next thirty days and then self-evaluate. I can handle a month.

I'm reading a book entitled, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. Although it's about writing, it's really advice for how to tackle any big (and potentially overwhelming) project. Just take it one piece, or one bird, at a time. Step in front of step runs a marathon. Decision upon decision builds a life less ordinary.

What, already?

What's wrong with me? It's only January 3rd and I'm already checking out shoes. One day of sore feet and I'm convinced I need new shoes. Oh, but it's so tempting. I play games in my head and tell myself that shoes aren't clothes. Shoes are necessary.

Yes, they are necessary but it's not like I don't have several pairs already. I just want something to replace my favorites which must be retired. They were comfortable and stylish and had a bit of "wow." I wore them to death. No amount of repair can save them anymore. I want another pair that has that same feel. There it is-- "I want."

Is there a way to want, to get and then not feel guilty?

First day of the first month: Finances.

I decided to tackle this one head on this morning. It's interesting because some of the other goals are caught up in this one from reducing clutter to cutting spending. So far I've cleared out my ridiculous files and shredded everything that could be tossed. Next I'm planning to evaluate some budgeting software and plugging in my information. I need a clear idea of how much money is coming in and going out each month so I can start working toward a goal-- travel?

Not only is savings a goal, but also knowing where the money goes matters. I keep thinking I waste a lot so I should focus on spending on what matters. That constant refrain. My question and comment. It's becoming my touchstone. If it doesn't matter, don't waste resources of time, energy, money, or emotion.

Back to work. I'm off to a good start and don't want to get too sidetracked. I'm not sure how to ward off my tendencies to procrastinate effectively.